How many times in my life will I say "I did not mean it?"
It is perfectly forgivable for a 7 years old, a little less for a 20 years old and after 25, it requires questioning.
Why do I do things I did not want to do?
Well the answer is simple: because we do not pay enough attention to our actions and to the world in general.
We
are too often absorbed by the complexity of our internal brooding,
bathed in a sticky unconsciousness and often acting against the most
common sense.
It is possible to find excuses for our lack of attention, for our mistakes, our ego mind is very adept at this.
Stopping to do whatever strikes our fancy could avoid exposing our clumsiness, but could also avoid hurting others and acting like a Neanderthal.
The solution is quite simple: you only need to be attentive to your world and your actions. Easy, isn't it?
But
the first quality that we lack to be attentive at all times, is
endurance: indeed, our attention span is determined by our will, but
also nurtured by our inner strength, our vitality. Even
if we want to remain conscious of our environment, of our actions, we must
have enough energy available to do so: look at how hard it is to be
present when we did not get enough sleep.
The second quality that we need is the will, the strength of our intention.
Often
in our daily lives, we tend not to go to the end of what we want to do: we put it back to later, we change our minds, we flee before what needs to be done. We'll have to "beef up" our attention and educate our willpower.
Strengthening attention is easy, but putting it into practice requires courage and perseverance.
The exercises are simple, everybody can do them ... but nobody does.
Exercises
focusing attention are numerous, they range from simple concentration
exercise to projection of consciousness exercises.
The will to act, the decision power, is primarily a capacity
to act out what is planned: it is a way to realize(physically) what is only thought.
It
is amazing to see all that what we want to do compared to what we actually do: it is easy to see that an effort is possible, surely desirable even...
Before working on this, by entering into a serious practice that can meet your
needs, it is possible to realize the efforts we'll have to provide: watch every two
hours your lacks of attention and your difficulties to act or say .
During the next two hours, try to pay attention ... then see the damage two hours later.
Realistically seeing the weakness of your attention, you will see the extent of the required work. Be careful to the noises you do while moving, eating, opening a door and
closing it, the things you do not say and those that you say, but also
what you have not done in the day and that you could have done ...
Aware
of the world and others, of your actions and posture, you go toward a conscious daily life that simplifies itself and does not create unnecessary suffering.
In addition, present in the moment, it is easier to be stable physically and emotionally.
Try consciousness, you will not want to do without it.